More RV jokes

George Washington cut down a cherry tree and then fessed up to dear old Dad after lying through his teeth. Right? Wrong! A myth. A government lie! And how about in South Dakota? Ever taken an RV trip up there? Did you visit Mount Rushmore National Park? Did you see all the Presidents heads up on the side of the peak? Did you buy into the story that a guy named Gutson Borglum climbed up on that hill day after day, month after month, blasting out the magnificent monument? Hah! What a joke: Borglum was a plumber! Lived near Rapid City. Worked days unclogging drains and at night sang Bulgarian folk tunes down at Penny Plopskis' piano bar. Have you ever hiked to the top of Mount Rushmore? We have. We knocked on George's head: The bloody thing is hollow! No kidding! It's plastic! That's what all the heads are made of -- plain ol' plastic. There's a moral here: Don't believe everything you see or hear, especially at National Parks.

A motorhome broke down along the freeway one day, so the driver eased it over onto the shoulder of the busy road.

He jumped out of his driver side door, walked around his rig and opened the door to the coach itself. Out popped two men in trench coats.

The men stood behind the motorhome and immediately opened up their coats, exposing themselves to the passing traffic. The result was one of the worst pile-ups in the road's history.

Later, when questioned by an angry highway patrolman why he put two deviates along the side of the road, the RVer replied, "I was broken down, so I just used my emergency flashers!"

In order to prevent buildup of solids in black water holding tanks, the following "one sheet" method of toilet paper (TP) usage is recommended. Take a single sheet of TP and fold it in half. Fold the sheet in half again. Tear off the corner that is formed by the center of the sheet. Save that little piece; it is very important. Insert the index finger in the hole in the TP formed by the missing corner. Wipe. Grab the TP tightly with the other hand and slide it off to clean the index finger. Then find the little piece torn off, and use it to clean under the fingernail. One sheet, one flush, no buildup!
-- contributed by Tom Crilly

Speed Trap

A police officer near Corpus Christi, Texas, had a perfect hiding place for watching for speeding cars and RVs. But one day, everyone was under the speed limit, and the officer soon learned why: A 10-year old boy was standing up the road a quarter mile with a large hand-painted sign that read "RADAR TRAP AHEAD." A little more investigative work led the officer to the boy's accomplice, another 10-year old boy about 100 yards beyond the radar trap with a sign that read "TIPS." At his feet was a bucket-full of change.